Her Real Name Isn't Blaineley is a song in the Total Drama World Tour episode "Aftermath Aftermayhem". It is sung by Geoff, with Blaineley's entourage as backup singers, in an attempt to list all the bad things about Blaineley as revenge. Geoff is provoked into singing the song when Blaineley angered him by sending Bridgette to Siberia against her will, instead of going herself. The song is requested by one of Blaineley's biggest fans.


Geoff: Here's an open letter to a treasure of a girl!

Blaineley: That's me!

Geoff: Whose behavior on this show always makes me hurl!

Blaineley: What?!

Geoff: She's a nasty, fake blonde schemer, who calls herself your host! Without the help of her entourage, her job would be toast!

Entourage: Hey!

Blaineley: Hey! Heeeyyy.....

Geoff: She'll tell you that she loves your shirt, but it's something she can't stand! She's just so full of you-know-what, she has to double-flush the can!

Entourage: Hey!

Blaineley: I eat a lot of fiber!

Geoff: She bought two pairs of the same jeans, one size four, and one size eight! So when she wears the bigger ones, you'll ask if she's lost weight!

Entourage: Hey!

Geoff: She's not the gal you think she is, so let me tell you plainly. There's thick black hair between her toes, and her real name isn't Blaineley!

Entourage: Hey!

Geoff: She's a phony, scheming, weasel-nose! And her real name isn't Blaineley! She steals and lies, and she's evil, bros, and her real name isn't Blaineley! It's Mildred!

Entourage: Hey!